Let me just blast the entire firm about this one...

Res judicata! ... Still not impressed? Res ipsa loquitur!

With the power of alcohol, my typing speed goes down to .00001 wpm!

Another PSA to law students...

*Looks in mirror fearfully*

Huh? Last week when I was sobbing under my desk? I don't remember...

When you lateral to a firm that turns out to be the same as your previous firm...

This is why it takes me half a day to send an email to a client...

Thanks, but no thanks...